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Joke of the Day
"Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin? It wanted to play squash."
Next Joke
"I dig. You dig. We dig. They dig. He dig. She dig. Now it's not a very beautiful poem, but it's quite deep."
"- ""I love Beyonce... - Whatever floats your boat dude. - No, you're thinking of 'buoyancy'. - ..."""
"Did you know John Travolta's home has an airport in it? Too bad, he got the bomb detecting dogs about 7 movies too late."
"What is the world coming to? Youporn"
"Wife's been away since thursday, we ran out of spaghetti-o's on friday, ate the dog yesterday, burned photo albums for heat today, pls help"
"Mariah Carey That awesome performance. Update: thanks for helping me get to the front page of r/jokes"
"Me: Define Illegal Cop: You're drunk, riding a horse, shooting a gun and yelling 'For Narnia' Me: I want my lawyer."
"Glass coffins - will they catch on? Remains to be seen!"
"Just another Saturday night at home alternating between sweet and salty snacks until I disgust myself enough to go to bed."