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Joke of the Day

"How do you get a clown off of its unicycle? Hit it in the face with a pickaxe."

"I tell pissed off women to ""calm down"" So yeah, I'm into extreme sports."

"I like my whiskey as I like my women. 12 years old and mixed with coke"

"Only 350 more followers until I casually mention the benefits of Amway."

"I can't wait to be rich so I can price things from high to low instead of low to high when shopping online."

"I started a band called 999 Megabytes. We haven't gone to a gig yet."

"The Socratic method of deductive reasoning walks into a bar and the bartender says ""So. What don't you want?"""

"Do let me know if you're ever unhappy with any of my Tweets. I will block you immediately. Anything to stop you being sad. You're welcome :)"

"The only thing left for CNN to do is drop Wolf Blitzer in the Indian Ocean and see how long it takes to find him."

"What do a cue ball and a Mexican have in common? The harder you hit 'em, the more english they pick up."