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Joke of the Day

"The Real Pink Panther Joke What did the Pink Panther say as he stepped on a bug? Dead Ant, Dead Ant Dead Ant Dead Ant Dead Ant Dead Ant, Dead AaaaaaaaaaAAAaaannt"

"My OCD requires me to slit the throats of people who sing Christmas songs to themselves out loud in quiet workplaces. The Cops understand."

"Behind every great man there's a great woman who can take whatever he just said and turn it into a great big fight"

"*burst into doctor's office* ME: I'm no longer canstopetid DOCTOR: You mean constipated ME: No I've had a vowel movement DOCTOR: Get out"

"My phone battery dies faster than a black guy in a horror movie."

"Why does Mr Tayto carry a phone in his top pocket? In case Johnny Onion Rings!"

"How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a really obscure number, you probably haven't heard of it."

"Project Manager Humor Why do Vampires make poor project managers? Because the refuse you to meet with stake holders. (why yes, I am a dad why do you ask?)"

"I got a boner at a funeral today... It was mourning wood"

"Women in England are hos! They've always ready to put some chapstick on their lips."