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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a dog with no back legs and metal balls? Sparky"
Next Joke
"With Parkinsons... Every weight is shake weight!"
"What did a kleptomaniac say on 90% sale? ""It was an absolute steal!"""
"Who's the fattest Knight at the round table? Why? Circumference. Because he ate too much pi."
"Me: What do you think of my tweets? Wife: They're all pretty terrible. Me: Don't you have ANYTHING positive to say? Wife: You're consistent."
"What is 6.9? A really great thing ruined by a period."
"I'm so good at this Fitbit thing! I reached my daily step goal before I even left my bed this morning!"
"I wasn't too impressed by Dr. Strange.. I've seen Stranger Things."
"In the Garden of Eden, Eve wore a fig leaf. Do you know what Adam wore? A hole in it."
"They say never go food shopping when you're hungry ... haven't ""they"" heard that ""seven days without food makes one weak?"""