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Joke of the Day

"What did Scooby Doo ask Shaggy for to order online porn? A Reddit card"

"Ever heard of jenkem? It's the shit!"

"I'm a humble person, really. I'm actually much greater than I think I am."

"Coworker: What was your college major? Me: How to avoid student-loan debt, with a minor in teen pregnancy."

"I'm sure it's just a coincidence that pop music has gotten shittier since we started picking our artists on game shows."

"What's the national bird of Iraq? The drone."

"Rick Astley is such a nice guy. He'll let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except for one. He's never gonna give you Up."

"I believe I can flyyy. I believe I can touch the skyyy. I believe I was mistaaaken. I believe I'm faaalling. I believe I'm gonna diiiie."

"*sees girl at bar* Hey baby, wanna get outta here? ""Sure!"" Good, you're really killing the vibe."

"""That was mesmerizing!"" I know another big word... huge."