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Joke of the Day

"How about a game? You provide a random set up and we provide the punchline (PTP?). Most upvoted wins imaginary internet points."

"A photon walks into a hotel. The desk clerk says, ""Welcome to our hotel. You look down."" The photon says, ""You can see that, yes."""

"Where do I see myself in five years? *kicks feet up on desk* Sir, does my resume list ""psychics abilities"" under skills? No. Next question."

"You what's great about dick jokes? They're just so easy to slip in there"

"[restaurant] ME: Excuse me, this alphabet soup tastes funny WAITER: Well it is Comic Sans"

"Why did the sperm cross the road? Cause I put on the wrong sock this morning"

"I get high before I get my Drivers License pic taken. That way I look normal if I'm pulled over."

"Kim and Kanye are now planning to have their wedding in Egypt. See Egyptians, things could always be worse."

"Duck you AutoCorrect! You Blimb! I'm way more BadApps than you make me out to be! You Ducking piece of shed..BuckFace Toothless Bastilleday!"

"Nice try, Team USA. Not bad for a country that only cares about soccer for two weeks every other year!"