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Joke of the Day
"Q: What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and a skinny blonde? A: One's a phony buck."
Next Joke
"Me: *Buys nutribullet* will this baby take down a vegan? Cashier: No, it's not an actual bu... Me: *loads nutrigun* Cashier: What the heck?"
"I came home the other day to find my girlfriend dipping twenty dollar billsin batter and frying them. I said, ""There you go again, frittering ourmoney away!"""
"One man. One dream. One crazy summer. Three wizards. Fourteen cobras. Ten thousand condoms. I dunno, I'm just listing things."
"What's long and hard every time you wake up? Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to."
"Why are bunnies so good at brewing? Cause beer is made with hops."
"An elderly woman at an ATM asked me to check her balance. So I pushed her over. Yep, she needs a walker"
"What the corniest part of a corn field? The corner."
"Top Seven Things Men Don't See Coming: 7. Plot twists 6. Police cruiser 5. Love 4. Trash day 3. Health issues 2. Her reaction 1. That"
"I work at a furniture store. My boss asked me to label and price all the new items. I said, ""Hey boss. How do you want me to label this stone armchair?"" He said, ""No man, clay chair."""