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Joke of the Day

"Pilot: ""What does this button do?"" *intercom turns on* Pilot: ""Doesn't do anything. Not sure what any of these buttons do."""

"What happened to the heretical chef? He was burnt at the steak."

"One of my wishes in life is to run across the Pacific Ocean in an air tight giant hamster ball."

"Why do women sound like they're having an orgasm when they play tennis? And why does my mother play Tennis in her bedroom?"

"What do you call a cross between a gorilla and a monkey? A cross."

"Did you hear the one about the man who ate his baby's feet? He also found out his wife was pregnant."

"As hillbillies age, they're called hillwilliams."

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a snowman. Doctor: Keep cool !"

"So crap that it's good (I hope) Whats white and cant climb trees? A fridge -_-"

"I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman: ""Where's the self-help section?"" She said that if she told me, it would defeat the purpose."