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Joke of the Day

"I was sitting on the train this morning, and I saw a really sexy Thai girl I thought to myself, ""Please don't get an erection, please don't get an erection"", but she did."

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"Food choices How come almost everything that tastes good is bad and almost everything that tastes bad is good?"
"I've replaced my neighbors toothpaste with Napalm, and left him a free pack a cigarettes. Now we wait."
"what's the difference between a girl in a church and a girl in a bathtub? The girl in church has hope in her soul whilst the girl in the bathtub has..."
"Once Upon a Time Is a brilliant series"
"A man walks into a crowded bar brandishing a gun... The man yells out ""WHOS BEEN SLEEPING WITH MY WIFE???"" A few moments later, a man in the back yells back ""YOU DONT HAVE ENOUGH BULLETS!""."
"My dad had a heart attack while laughing at his own joke I guess he had to deal with the punintended consequences."
"Looking for Sympathy? You'll find it between Shit and Syphilis in the dictionary."
"How do pigs talk? Swine language"
"Interesting fact: Prior to the creation of hummus and ranch dressing nobody ate uncooked vegetables."
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