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Joke of the Day

"Hey Pringles, It's time to widen the can. Your core demographic isn't exactly thin-wristed. Thank you!"

"I dunked on my brother one summer, like, 20 yrs ago, on the adjustable hoop in the driveway, & I still think about it roughly twice a week."

"So my friend got himself a trophy wife... From the looks of it, it was a participation award."

"Dear student loan, Thank you for saving my life. I can't think of how I can ever repay you."

"I got a new car for my wife I thought it was a great trade."

"I asked two Uber drivers to pick each other up and am watching them chase each other in circles around my block until they run out of gas."

"I don't understand why everyone thinks the KKK are racist. Every week at our meetings there's always loads of black people hanging around."

"Sarah Palin's political integrity. Because she's ~~a woman~~ an idiot."

"I always shave my beard after having sex ... so I can remind my wife for how long we've not been doing it."

"Coffee is the silent victim in our house... It gets mugged every day."