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Joke of the Day

"Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... Ba Dum Tiss"

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"Verbs Without them we wouldn't get a lot done."
"Good ice-breaker How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice I'm.."
"A yoga pants owner, an uggs owner, and an iphone owner walks into a starbucks She orders a drink - Pumpkin Spice Latte"
"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. I would like to invite you to play Candy Crush."
"""Sleep tight and don't let the bed bugs, snakes, spiders and rugby players bite."" How Aussie parents tuck their kids into bed at night."
"Who do zombie cowboys fight? Deadskins."
"What do you do when your girlfriend starts smoking? You slow down and add lubricant."
"Where do cows like to live? St. Moo-is."
"my accountant: look at ur currently monthly budget: RENT: $800 GAS: $200 CHEEZ-ITS: $2,750 me: ur right, i need a cheaper place."