105761

Joke of the Day

"In a courtroom... *Mickey. mouse, it says here you want to divorce mini because she was... extremely silly? ""No! I said she was fucking goofy!!"""

"God's first concept for a long-necked quadriped was just a rough giraffe."

"Seven Bar Jokes Involving Grammar and Punctuation http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/seven-bar-jokes-involving-grammar-and-punctuation"

"how many black live matters protester does it take to screw in a light bulb? no one knows it was too dark to see them."

"Look Disney all I'm saying is that if my stepdaughter brought a bunch of birds and mice into my mansion I'd make her clean up that shit too."

"Jury remains deadlocked in the case of Good Times v. Bad Times"

"Did I tell you my aunt died in this bed? #whatnottosayduringsex"

"Why are the news media like a prostitute? Because they are good at making stuff up."

"Somewhere in another dimension there is a Lingerie store called Victoria Secretes where all the panties already come with discharge on them"

"What happened to the man with two wooden legs whose house burnt down? He fell on his ash."