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Joke of the Day

"Our children are our future. Unless they invent a method for time travel, then they're also our past."

"1 out of 5 dentists is illiterate, and could not complete the survey."

"Why haven't we found aliens yet ? because they are searching for intelligent life too."

"People with eyebrow, nose, and lip piercings always look like they landed face-first into a tackle box."

"Two guys are drinking at the country club bar... First guy says, ""Hey, you want to go play some golf?"" Second guy says, ""No, not today."" ""Why not?"" ""Because I never drink and drive."""

"Why did the airplane no longer work? Because it was **terminal**ly ill. I'll show myself out."

"What do Asian pirates say? ELLLLLLL!!!"

"Why hasn't Harper Lee had any kids? Because she's never spoonfed anyone anything."

"Limericks eh? There once was a fellow named Blair Who was having his girl on the stair On the 44th stroke The banister broke So he finished her off in the air."

"Are you Russian? Cause I'll be Putin my dick in your mouth tonight. (Don't use as a pick up line doesn't work)"