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Joke of the Day
"What do you need to make a crystal salad? Onions, tomatoes, and a whole bunch of lattice"
Next Joke
"You know why half a joke isn't funny?"
"2 guys walk into a bar 3rd one ducks."
"When cats are sad... Bartender: ""What can I get you?"" Cat: ""Shot of tequilla."" *Bartender pours it.* *Cat slowly pushes it off the bar.* Cat: ""I'll have another."""
"What do you call introverted hobbits? Shyer folk"
"What if ISIS started claiming responsibility for nice things like when my mom says, ""who emptied the dishwasher?!"""
"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? A hippo weighs a ton while a zippo is a little lighter."
"Reporter: To what do you attribute your old age? Old Man: To the fact that I was born in 1890."
"And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars."
"I never realized how many people I hated until I got a facebook"