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Joke of the Day

"Adulthood is like looking both sides before crossing the street and them getting hit by an airplane."

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"I once met an Asian with excellent grammar... So I said, ""Wow, your grammar is so good!"" And they replied, ""No.....my grandma's dead."""
"What does bigamy mean? One wife too many. What does monogamy mean? Same fucking thing."
"What does Sonic the Hedgehog wear when he goes to the beach? A speedo"
"My wife has been helping my neighbor hook up his VCR for 3 hours now. Starting to get suspicious... What kind of monster still has a VCR?"
"That annoying moment when you're waiting for a text & you get one but it's from the wrong person."
"What did the Chinaman cleaning the rotisserie say to the crestfallen window shopper? No Peking!"
"What's the difference between a hockey player and a hippie chick? A hockey player takes shower after three periods."
"Did you hear about the guy who killed the sphinx? i hear he's one bad-ass motherfucker..."
"Q. What did dela wear?(Delaware) A. Her New Jersey"
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