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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell the difference between a Fleshlight and the porn star it was modeled after? Rubber clit..."

"LION: Lions don't lose sleep over the opinion of sheep. SHEEP: Shaun thinks your mane looks ridiculous. LION: *upset* Shaun said that?"

"Please join me. My daughter an I did this for hours one day. Zombie phlebotomist, veinnnnns. Zombie engineer, traaaaiiins. Zombie Dixie Chicks fan, Natalie Maiiiinns."

"What do you call a hacker who stays home when it snows outside? Edward Snowed-in!"

"Donald ""Pharmabro"" Trump: He wwebsite as on the internet!"

"My girlfriend is fed up of my constant wordplay jokes. I asked her, ""What can I do to stop my addiction?"" She said, ""Whatever means necessary."" ""No it doesn't,"" I said."

"""No Kanye, it's called Coney Island."" ""Kanye Island."" ""Coney Island"" ""Kanye Island."" ""Co... ney."" ""Kan... ye."""

"Why does Batman think so highly about himself? Bruce Wayne."

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? They don't, they just shoot the room for being black."

"Q: What did one flea say to the other flea when they came out of the movies? - A: Should we walk home or take a dog?"