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Joke of the Day

"Please join me. My daughter an I did this for hours one day. Zombie phlebotomist, veinnnnns. Zombie engineer, traaaaiiins. Zombie Dixie Chicks fan, Natalie Maiiiinns."

"Hey son, I know you're 5 years old and you think monsters are under your bed, so here's a gun, just start shooting if you hear anything"

"Why can't two Asians make a Caucasian? Because two wongs don't make a white."

"What Should Make A Book Teacher: ""What Should Be In A Book To Make It A Bestseller?"" Jorkens: ""A Girl On The Cover & No Cover On The Girl"""

"It would be nice if Republicans and Democrats could work together to limit Nicolas Cage to 6 movies a year."

"What food do vampires hate? Steaks."

"Definition of a Will: It's a dead giveaway."

"Why did Saul want to kill Christians? Because he was Saulty. I'll^show^^myself^^^out..."

"I smiled today. I'm going to be so sore tomorrow!"

"Why did C++ look down at C? It thought C lacked class. i'll see myself out"