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Joke of the Day

"Why are Mexicans bad at UNO? They steal all the green cards."

"Remember when The Backstreet Boys told us to show them the meaning of being lonely and we were like ok"

"INTERVIEWER: Says here you do magic tricks? ME: *hands him back his business card* Is this your card? INTERVIEWER: holy shit"

"So a black guy walks into a bank... Approaching the nearest available teller, he says, ""Hi, I'd like to file for bankruptcy."" ""Okay"", the teller replies, ""what's your name?"" ""Fifty Cent"" badum tisss"

"What's a frogs favorite drug? Croakcain."

"Why did the melon have commitment issues? Because he cantaloupe"

"That burrito didn't agree with me. And then I was like ""Why am I arguing with a burrito?!"""

"Bad pirate jokes! I'll start. What be a pirate's favorite restaurant? You'd think it was Arby's, but it's actually Long John Silver's."

"I get so excited when Facebook tells me there are hot singles in my city who want to meet me. Maybe they want to babysit!"

"Why were Jeremy Clarkson's colleagues excited to try his mulled wine? Because they'd been floored by his punch."