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Joke of the Day

"I finally got around to getting a vasectomy the other day... but there hasn't been a vas deferens in my sex life since then."

"How to fleas travel ? Itch hiking !"

"Anyone can sit here and buy you drinks. I want to buy you dinner!"

"What's the most common sleeping position of a man? Around. "

"[Rumpelstiltskin comes to take first born son] ""Give me what you promised unless you can guess my name"" Here ""Aren't you going to guess?"""

"What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant."

"It's getting colder and colder outside, and my wife does nothing but looks through the window. If it goes on like this any longer, I think I will have to let her in."

"I can't wait until the 50th Anniversary Special... I'm very interested in who JFK will regenerate as."

"Hey venus flytrap got you a treat how bout a big ol juicy bug open your mouth..BOOM THATS A MILK DUD you're a plant you eat sunlight idiot"

"Knock knock... Who's there? *sigh* Mormons..."