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Joke of the Day

"So, my friend who hasn't slept in 24 hours just blurted this out... Confucius say, don't leave the chronic masturbator behind. Horny man may come in handy!"

"You couldnt even have sex with me if you were the last person on earth! Good. Im not a necrophile."

"What's the great thing about having aids for gay men No need to worry about getting it again"

"Kids, just because I don't care doesn't mean I'm not listening."

"Why did the campfire turn into a forest fire? It wanted to get off its ash."

"Employer: why do you want this job?....... Employer: why do you want this job? Me: $o I can expand my re$ume and gain experien$e in the job field $$$$$$$"

"My kids are mad at me because I never unwrap the cheese slices in their sandwiches"

"Of all the stupid things the church makes people believe, leading everyone to believe they can and should sing is the absolute worst."

"As soon as I get to a party, I start saying goodbye; that way I'm out of there within 4 hours."

"""But I can't conquer China, it's way too big..."" Now Genghis, what do I always say? *Sighs* ""I'm Genghis Khan, not Genghis Khan't"""