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Joke of the Day

"HOW TO BECOME A CRAZY CAT LADY: 1) Get a cat. 2) Repeat."

"What would you get if you crossed a witch with a famous movie director? Steven Spellberg!"

"Your mom is so fat She's the trunk of the family tree"

"[talking to mcdonalds cashier] which burger has the most acai berry vitamins and superfood antioxidants?"

"Why are fishermen so good at geometry? Cause they're good anglers."

"Man walks into doctors office with a frog on his head... Doctor: can i help you? Frog: yeah, get this thing off my ass!"

"My girlfriend told my to stop singing 'Wonderwall' I said maybe"

"What's the difference between a 6 month old and a 20 year old? About 6 garbage bags and 30 gallons of formaldehyde."

"Why did they not allow farmers in Greece? They got tired of all the minotaurs."

"I have an eating disorder... I'm about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets."