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Joke of the Day

"Want to dance? Or should I go to hell again?"

"Did you know that I can see into the future? I have 2020 vision"

"TIL that if you took all the veins in your body and laid them end to end... You would die."

"*Seeing words in itallic...* Makes me want to eat *pasta*."

"A Quebecer staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper. ""Black pepper, or white pepper?"" asked the concierge. ""Toilette pepper!"" yelled the Quebecer."

"Never Trust an Atom. They make up everything!"

"My favorite dinosaur is the Clitorous, its is the smallest of the dinosaurs, it is also hard to find because it likes to hide in the bushes Credit goes to comedian Etta May."

"Attractive women post selfies and refer to themselves as ugly. As a group, if we begin agreeing with them we could stop that shit quick."

"Manufacturing Landmines I started manufacturing Landmines in my basement thinking that it'd be cheaper than buying them, but it still cost me an arm and a leg"

"You know what they say about not arguing with stupid... People on the outside might not be able to tell the difference, so go ahead and delete all your liberal friends on facebook."