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Joke of the Day

"Never Trust an Atom. They make up everything!"

"I only like 70 things.. One is alcohol. Another is 69."

"What's the opposite of Christopher Walken Christopher Reeve"

"Why couldn't the hippie reach his tie dyed T-shirt? Because it was Far Out!"

"A guy goes to a $5 lady of the night... And he gets crabs. So the next day, he goes back to complain. And the woman says, ""Hey, it was only $5. What did you expect, lobster?"""

"It's a good thing Gatorade was invented at the University of Florida and not Florida State University. Because then it would be Seminole fluid."

"I wish I could Google search...Who likes me?"

"How does a candy bar laugh? It snickers"

"What did batman say to the joker when he finally caught him? Gotham"

"I thought my date had big man hands... until I realized I was sitting in the wrong seat in the theater after coming back from the restroom"