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Joke of the Day

"Sneezing while driving is my version of extreme sports."

"Next month on the 13th, the date will be 13/13/13."

"Tomorrow's Thanksgiving! Have a fowl meal!"

"Duck Joke A duck walks into a bar. The ducks say, ""1 beer please. And put it on my bill."" I'll be here all week"

"I tried dating a stenographer but she wasn't my type"

"If someone posts a picture of their kid on Facebook making a stupid face, I like to comment with, ""Oh, NOW I see the resemblance!"""

"If you cut me off in traffic you better be ready to look in your rearview mirror and see me yelling something you can't hear."

"My son ran away again, but it gets worse. I think this time he took the remote."

"What's the difference between modern-day men and modern-day women? If you give a man a lemon, he'll make lemonade. But if you give a woman a lemon, she'll find some way to accuse it of rape."

"My British friend Julian Wang just bought his first automobile We call it the Wang car. //needs work"