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Joke of the Day

"What do elephants use for tampons? Sheep."

"Another 69 joke So I asked my gf if she wanted to 69. She rolled her eyes and said sure as long as we can 77 after cause I'll probably finish too fast and she'll still need to be ate more."

"Linguistic studies have shown results about drivers of east asian cars... It is proven that a large number of Hyundai owners have an accent."

"""Arise! Arise! Foul creatures, I command that you arise! ARISE!"" ""Dad, just once, couldn't you let mom or the alarm clock wake us?"" ""ARISE!"""

"A vegan, an atheist, and a CrossFit enthusiast walk into a bar. I only know because they wouldn't shut the fuck up about it."

"How do you get your girlfriend to stop giving you blowjobs? You marry her."

"What did the Jewish pedophile say? Ay kid, go easy on the candy!"

"What do you call a nosy pepper? Jalapeno business!"

"Did you hear about the ghost who learnt to fly? He was pleased to be back on terror-firma."

"When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway!"