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Joke of the Day

"Two atoms are walking down the street... One of them says, ""Oh my. I think I've lost an electron."" And the other says, ""Oh my God! It's a talking atom!"""

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"What's the most awkward part of a redneck wedding? When her father and brother walk her down the isle."
"How does a young man make an old woman feel young again? Elixir"
"What are a parrot's favourite literary characters? Mr Macawber and Pollyanna!"
"My friends hate my cheese jokes. They said that they're no Gouda"
"Pessimist: This can't get any worse. Optimist: Yes it can!"
"Whats the difference between the English cricket team and a teabag? A teabag stays in the cup longer"
"Why does America spell some words differently? They said ""We can do it without u, Britain."""
"Can February March? Don't know but April May..."
"If my girl didn't want me to wear her new Christmas thong, she shouldn't have said she bought it ""for me."" Women are confusing."