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Joke of the Day
"Pessimist: This can't get any worse. Optimist: Yes it can!"
Next Joke
"Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens."
"[Jesus is resurrected after 3 days] Mary Magdalene: I KNOW YOU SAW MY TEXTS"
"On April 16, 2017, a small French city will detach from the surface of the Earth and fly into space, killing everyone. It's just Toulouse."
"How do you get an Asian to crash their car? Make the windshield full screen"
"I went for sushi with Luke Skywalker and he was struggling with chopsticks... ""Use the fork, Luke!"" I said."
"No I don't hate my boss. It's just that I wish his toilet paper was sand paper."
"Why was 10 afraid? Because it was in the middle of 9/11"
"What's black and white and red all over? A nun falling down the stairs."
"man...im so hungry i could- *i catch eye contact with a horse* ""you could what?"" *shows his gun* i could.. eat a sandwich ""thought so."""