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Joke of the Day

"There is 3 types of people in this world... People who are good at maths, and people who aren't."

"My friends are weird. They keep vegetables in their beer crisper. Freaks"

"What do you call a gas station that sells crabs? A crustacean."

"I used to be really into nostalgia... ...those were good times."

"Did you hear about the bird that lost all of its feathers in a volcano? It was moltin'."

"I've been searching for my stolen bed. And I won't rest until I find it."

"Why can't a hand be 12 inches long? BECAUSE THEN IT WOULD BE A FOOT!"

"Breaking News: Radio Shack is closing 1,100 stores nationwide. Even Breakier News: I can't believe there's 1,100 Radio Shack's."

"*friend bites off beer bottle cap at party* HONEY! HONEY!! NOW!! NOW!!! *wife jumps out car with a hundred jars from the fridge*"

"Why did the gum cross the road? Because it was under the elephants foot."