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Joke of the Day

"How many divorced men does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question. No one knows, they never get the house."

"Do you know what moth balls smell like? How did you get their tiny legs apart?"

"Yesterday I met a pirate that wouldn't stop telling me about his age. Aye matey."

"A man goes to a library and asks for a book on suicide......... Librarian stares at him for a while, then asks: Who's gonna bring it back ?"

"'I hope you're not one of those boys who sits and watches the school clock' said the principal to a new boy. 'No Sir. I've got a digital watch that bleeps at three-fifteen.'"

"My abusive father always tells jokes His favorite part is the Punch Line."

"Monica Lewinski Will Not Vote for Hillary Clinton The last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth."

"Someone fell asleep next to me on the bus so I'm drawing penises on their forehead. Let this be a warning to all sleepy toddlers out there."

"I miss being a kid and playing cowboys and Indians. Now whenever I chase people around with a tomahawk I get arrested."

"I was a fantastic parent right up until I had kids of my own."