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Joke of the Day

"What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin"

"I used to care... what people in the adjacent bathroom stalls thought of me, but now, I don't give a shit"

"""She had a heart of gold."" - autopsy report"

"Knock Knock Who's there? Ah Ah who? God bless you"

"What is it called when Venom snake gets spotted doing something bad? Getting caught red handed!"

"How many non-sequiturs does it take to change a light bulb? Yes"

"I used to be poor. Then I found a thesaurus now I am impecunious."

"My doctor said I can't lift more than ten pounds... Can you help me pee?"

"What did the masturbator say when returning the porn that his friend let him borrow? [OC] Thanks, came in handy!"

"JOKE - Boy and His Train Set"