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Joke of the Day

"What would George Washington do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin"

"Pretty offensive joke: Why does all Turkish men have a mustache? because they wanna look like their mother."

"Daughter just asked me how to spell bourbon so she's either asking Santa to hook up her old man or writing a letter to child services."

"Oh, so you wanna argue? BRING IT, I GOT MY CAPS LOCK ON !"

"An Irishman and Two British men Walk into a bar......."

"[Pickup Line] Are you a phillips or flathead? OP: Uh, I don't know, why? YOU: I'm just trying to figure out how to screw you."

"My love is like communism; everyone gets a share, and it's only good in theory."

"Why did the semen cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning..."

"A boy says to his step-dad ""You're not my real dad"", and his step-dad says ""you're right, because I'm here right now""."

"The girls I meet in bars have the worst pickup lines. They're like, ""Hey, what's your friend's name?"" Never works on me ladies."