153596
Joke of the Day
"Why did the semen cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning..."
Next Joke
"My new coloring book, How To Tell The Woman You Love You've Been Living In Her Shrubs For A Year, comes out on tUESsdhay martha i love you"
"I'm officially putting my GPA up for adoption... I just can't raise it myself [joke credit to the girl I overheard say it in the library] Edit: apparently its from yikyak?"
"The bartender says ""We don't serve time travellers here."" A time traveller walks into a bar."
"There should be a prenatal test to tell if you're gonna have one of those kids with tiny teeth and giant gums."
"[planning heist] LEADER: we can kill the alarm, but how do we get through the concrete wall? *everyone turns to look at the kool-aid man*"
"FUN PRANK: when a stranger hands you their phone to take a picture of their family, take a selfie instead and also steal their phone"
"Q: Why did the blonde make love in the microwave? A: She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes."
"[Being murdered at Walmart] Please will you dump my dead body at Target people can't know I shopped here"
"I'm going to go on a Brexit diet The pounds will drop fast."