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Joke of the Day

"My surgeon friend that specialized in Augmentation Mammaplasty just died. I regret not being there the moment he took his last breast."

"Mommy mommy what happened to all your scabs ...[NSFL] Shut up and eat your corn flakes!"

"Did you hear about the patriotic zombie who wanted to serve his country? He joined the Marine Corpse."

"I asked an atheist ""How do you view homosexuality?"" He replied ""Mostly on pornhub"""

"Two muffins are in the oven. . . One turns to the other and says ""its a bit hot in here"", the other screams ""ahhh! a talking muffin"""

"""It's a boy!"" ...he screamed, ""it's a boy!"". Tears rolling down his face, and he vowed to never go back to Thailand."

"I don't want to do cocaine. I just want to know what it smells like."

"What is the definition of ""making love?"" It's something a woman does when a man is fucking her."

"If your ringtone is my alarm sound, you can go straight to hell"

"How do you kill a circus clown ? You go for the juggler"