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Joke of the Day

"What's red and white and red, red and white and red and white? Santa Claus rolling down a roof!"

"[Justice League HQ] SUPERMAN: Looks like Batman is hungry tonight MOTHMAN: [visibly sweating] I think I'll just fight daytime crimes"

"Q: Why did the blonde snort Sweet-n-Low? A: She thought it was Diet Coke."

"Don't you love followers that don't acknowledge your existence. Its so cute. Its like I have tiny marriages all over the world."

"I hate when I give people nicknames like ""stupid face"" on my phone and I cant remember who the stupid face is."

"Why did the cows return to the marijuana farm? It was the pot calling the cattle back."

"Have you heard about Karma, the new restaurant? There's no menu. You just get what you deserve."

"Why did the packaged green onion get into trouble? Because it was a wrapped scallion."

"What do you get if you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo."

"Why do businessmen carry umbrellas? Because umbrellas can't walk."