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Joke of the Day

"Waiter I can't seem to find any oysters in this oyster soup. Would you expect to find angels in angel cake?"

"[After reading vows] Me: Why are you upset? Her: Me: Was it the Donald- Her: Yes, it was the Donald Duck voice."

"Found another spider in my bedroom, so now I'm on the curb watching my house burn down."

"It's all fun and games when there's a hole in your bucket... ...the problems start when there's a bucket in your hole."

"Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working? A: Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No."

"A door walks into a bar The bartender asks, ""Why the long face?"" The door responds, ""I'm off my hinges."""

"Then there was the Olympic Sprinter that tested positive for Viagra.... He tripped during the 100m Dash and won gold in the pole vault."

"A Black man and a Mexican jump off a cliff who wins? Society."

"Something I like to do when I'm voting is tell to turn to the person at the stall next to me and whisper, ""What did you put for number 3?"""

"I recently found an audio bible narrated by James Earl Jones Overall it was good, though the book of Luke seemed a bit forced"