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Joke of the Day

"Seen on a prison wall: ""VIRGINITY who says you can only lose it once?"""

"Doctor: Describe your headache. Me: She's about 5'8"", blonde, and the mother of my children."

"Scientists recently discovered the source of the quark... It's the sound made by a posh duck."

"What did Adele name her sandwich shop? A deli"

"GYM Man: ""Can you spot me?"" Me: ""Sure"" Man: *Throwing down towel* ""Invisibility cloak my ass"""

"wooden leg named smith My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith. So I asked him ""What was the name of his other leg?"""

"I love pussy, It's the cunt around it I cant stand"

"Last night I had a bad dream about a nocturnal horse It was a real night-mare"

"Are you a computer whiz? it seems you know how to turn my software to hardware."

"I love the queen in chess... I always mate with her."