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Joke of the Day

"The best place to hide a dead body is page 2 of Google search results or page 1 of Bing."

"""With great power, comes great responsibility"" - - Melania Trump"

"Can we just hold the power button down on America and see if that fixes anything?"

"Why was Hitler late for work? He tried driving a new route to work, but instead of taking the second left, he took the third reich."

"Get off your high horse. Send your high horse to rehab. Keep an eye out to make sure your horse isn't getting high again."

"i'm happy when life hands me lemons. can't do shots of tequila with artichokes."

"In the Garden of Eden, Eve wore a fig leaf. Do you know what Adam wore? A hole in it."

"""No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying."""

"The blind have a braille version of the bible... The Really Holy Bible."

"Me: oil change plz Toyota: it'll be $39 Me: cool heres my $2 off coupon 4 hrs later T: ur steering wheel fell off total is $2900 sign here"