101576

Joke of the Day

"That awkward moment when it's not actually awkward, but just sort of a general observation about everyday life."

"What do you do when a timeline dies? Barry it."

"If you want some alone time, tell your husband that you're going to watch the Bachelor. Even if you're not."

"That annoying moment when you're waiting for a text & you get one but it's from the wrong person."

"I love Halloween. Its the only time I can wear my KKK outfit and get away with it."

"RIP Boiling water You'll be mist."

"I'd probably be, like, 5% cooler if I wasn't terrified of being on a moving skateboard."

"[Voice from police helicopter] PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR! *raises hands* *takes flattering selfie in helicopter spotlight* *uploads new avi*"

"Borderline Crazy!!! A passenger plane crashes on the border of Tanzania and Kenya. Where are the survivors buried?"

"Is it ok to have sex with a third cousin? I didn't seem to have any problems with the first two."