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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear that Iowa State is now offering Agriculture courses? It's a growing field"

"[High school reunion] Classmate: I've been out building schools in Africa Me: I got banned from the zoo for gluing sideburns onto a dolphin"

"The last four letters of the word ""queue"" are just there because they saw a queue forming and hoped it was for something good."

"There was an old lady at a ATM today, she asked me if I could help check her balance. So I pushed her over."

"VICTIM: He had a beard & a scar SKETCH ARTIST: Is this him? VICTIM: That's Bart Simpson SKETCH ARTIST: Yeah I can only draw a couple things"

"Fat joke with girlfriend Me : I want to go to McDonald's grab something to eat Gf : yeah that's what fat people do !!! Me : alright then you can grab something for me ! Thanks babe :)))"

"Why were the ducks arrested? They were selling quack in the park."

"A gymnast walks into a bar. She is promptly deducted five points"

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a light bulb? YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW, YOU WASN'T THERE!"

"A guy did squats at a talent show... He called it a stand up routine."