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Joke of the Day

"20 yrs from now they'll make a movie on how Leonardo DeCaprio never won an Oscar. Plot twist the actor playing him wins an Oscar."

"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb really has to want to change."

"How heavy is a photon? I don't know, but it's probably light-weight"

"Why Trump is the most religious president in United States history? He got Every Juan praying!"

"""And what do your parents do?"" BABY COW: Well, my mom is basically a vending machine and my dad is hamburgers"

"Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only cums once a year"

"Jehovah's witnesses don't celebrate Halloween...I guess they don't appreciate random people coming up to their doors."

"What's the difference between a bass player and a large pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four."

"The mechanic has informed me that the shrieking sound I hear in my car on my way to work is apparently me."

"how do you know if an asian man robbed your house your homeworks done, your computers upgraded, and 3 hours later hes still trying to back out the driveway."