100715

Joke of the Day

"Why should you never date a vegan girl? She won't swallow."

"Did you hear they discovered a soda cavemen drank? It's a carbon dated beverage... Good jokes are good"

"How many stream cleaners does it take to change a lightbulb? Sorry, they can only change the floor essence."

"Why should you never go drinking if you wear a monocle? Because then you'd be a barnacle."

"I've been using ProductsTM for years and let me tell you, Other BrandsTM can't compare !"

"I was once slapped in the face by a girl with twelve nipples... (.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.)(.) Sounds weird, dozen tit?"

"What do you call a nun that is lost? A Roamin' Catholic"

"Q: Why do blondes always die before help arrives? A: They always forget the ""11"" in ""9-1-1""."

"Coworker: Are you seeing anyone? Me: Unfortunately. CW: Then why are you dating her? Me: No, I meant you're standing in front of me."

"You name it, my mother knows somebody who died of it."