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Joke of the Day

"Promised myself that today I wouldn't steal anything, kill anyone or use any Meatloaf song lyrics in a sentence & two out of three ain't bad"

Next Joke
 
"Egyptian joke A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Rocher."
"How much does a dead elephant weigh? A skele**ton**."
"What type of jokes don't work Dark jokes."
"What do people call their grandmother in India? Naana"
"What is a relationship? It's the one that always sinks...."
"In 1973, the Six Million Dollar Man consisted of a bionic man with super powers... In 2016, the Six Million Dollar Man consists of two hip replacements."
"Why are lesbians such poor cooks? Because they love to eat out."
"A condom doesn't guarantee safe sex. My friend was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband."
"I tried to use ""MyDick"" as my Netflix password... ...Netflix told me ""not long enough."""