99841

Joke of the Day

"My dad is a magician. He even has a trick that makes him turn invisible. He's been doing it for the last 32 years."

"I started a band called 999 megabytes.... ...we have yet to secure a gig."

"What's the difference between a crackhead and a methhead? Toothless methheads give better $3.50 blowjobs"

"There are no absolutes in this world. Except vodka."

"What's more covered in sweat than a marathon runner at the end of a race? Josh Duggar at a family reunion."

"We've all been there. In your mom, that is."

"If your a kid and want to become cooler, heres a tip. Start smoking cigarette's. You can thank me later."

"It met a girl with 12 nipples. Sounds funny, Dozen tit?"

"The lazy river is my favorite ride at this amusement park. ""Ahhhhh!"" I scream as I float in a giant circle, not spilling my drink at all"

"What's the difference between a car tyre, and 365 condoms? One's a Goodyear, an the other's a great year."