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Joke of the Day

"ME: we can do this GOOGLE SMART CAR: we can't clear the bridge ME: *mashes 'im feeling lucky' button*"

"Best thing ever is when you see your X-Girlfriend and she is now your XL-girlfriend"

"It's the eye of the tiger. It's the spleen of a sheep."

"[Eating ribs at BBQ Joint] ""Would you like a Wet-Nap?"" No thanks, I had one this afternoon."

"In World War 3, which country would retreat first? Iran."

"How do fireflies start a race? Ready steady glow!"

"Why does my computer always ask me if I'm ""sure"" about stuff? Yes, I want to delete my hard drive."

"My humor is kind of like food... Not everyone gets it."

"Husband asked his wife ""why don't you tell me when you orgasm?"" She replied ""because I don't like calling you at work."""

"I had a detention for only using uppercase letters today Stupid capital punishment"