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Joke of the Day
"[Eating ribs at BBQ Joint] ""Would you like a Wet-Nap?"" No thanks, I had one this afternoon."
Next Joke
"So, I was waiting for my dad at the bar for a reunion He walks in and asks ""Hey son, how's it going with the ladies?"". ""Its not the going with the ladies I care about , it's the coming""."
"Did I tell you that my girlfriend has the flu? Yeah, basically."
"Who needs to watch the #SOTU when I can just read my TL? Here's what I've learned so far: John Boehner is still orange."
"What do vegetarian zombies want? Graaaaiiiiinss!"
"I think it's pretty cool Chinese people made a language made entirely out of tattoos."
"Confucius say, man who fart in church. Sit in own pew."
"I feel like grabbing a random kid by the shoulders and screaming ""I'm you from the future!"""
"""and this lake shall be called Superior"" all the other Great Lakes: ""k wow we're like right here"""
"Life would be simpler if you were notified when you were added to lists IRL. ""Your crush"" has added you to list ""Friend Zone""."