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Joke of the Day

"What is more inappropriate than a 7 year old saying ""I drink coffee""? Her saying ""I drink it black, like my men"""

"The chicks better be hot on this Mayan calendar."

"Every time this gets RTed a member of Congress gets kicked in the groin."

"I got arrested at the airport last week... Apparently, security doesn't appreciate it when you call ""shotgun"" before boarding a plane."

"No autocorrect, I don't want to bang a bunch of hot chimps."

"Just found out men don't need prostate exams till at least 40. I think my doctor has a lot of explaining to do."

"How to spell ""me"" A man walks up to a woman and asks her to spell the word ""ME"" for him. She says, ""M-E"". The man says, ""But you forgot the D!"" ""But there's no ""D"" in ""ME""!"" He says, ""Not yet.."""

"I had this roomate who was weird I used to write and one day I turned around. He had his cock out on my writing paper and was drawing a line around it. I never should have moved in with Dick Tracy."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Adam ! Adam who ? Adam up and tell me the total !"

"I love self-depreciating humor.. ..but I suck at it"