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Joke of the Day

"Is Jared Fogle going to jail?? Because I heard he's looking at 8-12 years..."

"While at our wedding, I pointed out to my wife-to-be... that her her veil wasn't nearly opaque enough. She responded by discreetly implying she would hit me. It was a thinly-veiled threat."

"What's the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer? one can wash their crack and re-sell it!"

"Hey baby, You know how I know I'm getting laid tonight? I'm stronger than you."

"What do you call a smiling black man? Snigger."

"I have beef- -aroni."

"I had no idea she was allergic to rat poison your honor"

"If you have to do more than 3 takes when taking a picture of yourself, it's not the angle or the lighting. It's you. You're ugly."

"An astronaut in space was asked by a reporter ""How do you feel?"" ""How would you feel"" the astronout replied ""if you were stuck here on top of 20000 parts each one supplied by the lowest bidder?"""

"I was going to tell a Mexican joke... but that's just crossing the border"