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Joke of the Day
"I have beef- -aroni."
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"A doctor enters a patients room and pulls out an anal thermometer from his pocket and says Damn. Some asshole has my pen."
"She's so ugly, she made a freight train take a dirt road!"
"What is the most common comment on Reddit? OPs mother."
"A lot of people don't realize that Shania Twain's father, Mark, was actually a pretty good writer."
"Take pride in what you're into, if thats exponents, well... More power to ya!"
"A man on his death bed smells cookies, gets up and walks into his kitchen. He asks his wife if he can have a cookie. The wife tells him to get out of here, those are for the wake"
"My son: do kids that get bullied go to college? Me: no they go to the police academy"
"4 stages of life 1. You believe in Santa 2. You don t believe in Santa 3. You are Santa 4. You look like Santa"
"A cryogenic experiment to freeze people at absolute zero just succeeded. I know because my friend took part in it. Don't worry, he's OK."