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Joke of the Day
"Another day, another nope."
Next Joke
"Why do black people have nightmares? One had a dream and died"
"The book I'm reading says ""4-6 years"" on the cover, but there's only like 6 words on each page. I'll be finished by the end of the week."
"Why didn't Johnny go to the 7 A.M. funeral? Because he just isn't a mourning person."
"If doors have a website shouldn't windows have one too? We'd better or it will be curtains for us."
"*slaps the shit out of a fish with a slightly larger, more confused fish*"
"Ok you with pneumonia, go sit between the perfectly healthy lady and the guy with the blood shooting out of his leg and wait. -hospitals"
"Friends- What did you get for your birthday? Her- He went to Jared Friends- You're engaged!!! Her- No Jared is our weed dealer"
"What do you call it when you have to listen to rock music obsessively? OC/DC"
"Stole a cart from this woman at Walmart today. I like to think of it as playing grand theft auto suburbs edition."