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Joke of the Day

"I have a french gun for sale from WW1. In excellent condition. Never been used and only dropped once."

"Instagram makes me feel like the world's only employed person."

"I bought my shoes from a drug dealer... I dont know what he laced them with,but Ive been tripping all day."

"What is similar about a necrophiliac and an alcoholic? They both like to crack open a cold one"

"Rick Astley will loan you any movie in his Pixar collection except for one... He's never going to give you Up"

"What did Hitmonlee say to Hitmonchan when he said he said his jokes sucked? ""I'm sorry , I'm not very good at executing punchlines."""

"I've got 99 problems, which really bothers me since I've also got OCD and I prefer even numbers."

"Welcome to the movie theater snack bar! Have some crunchy popcorn, noisy cup of ice, crinkly candy bags, maracas, bubble wrap, and a parrot!"

"Sex on the golf course: Is that considered a ""hole-in-one?"""

"What's 50 Cents name in Zimbabwe? 400 Million Dollars"