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Joke of the Day

"*peeing in the urinal at McDonalds* *turns to the guy peeing in the other urinal* ""So, what did you order?"""

"I missed you with all my darts"

"Husband sat in his room throwing darts.... at his wife's photo but not even a single one hit the target. From another room the wife asks the husband : ""What are you doing?"" . Husband: ""MISSING YOU""."

"A fella visited his doctor and says "" hi doc, I'm totally depressed and suicidal because I can do crosswords very easily and quickly"" Doctor says "" hey come on now, don't get two down""!"

"pranking neighborhood teens by pulling my car into their driveway & putting a bow on it so they think their parents bought it for them"

"Why did the sea-monster eat 5 ships filled with potatoes? Because no one can eat just one potato ship."

"How do you confuse a palaeontologist? Give them a used tampon and ask what period it's from."

"What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth and Sarah Palin's vagina? Only one fifth of what comes out of her vagina is retarded."

"Santa Clause and a Jew [NSFW] Whats the difference between Santa Clause and a Jew? Santa Clause comes down the Chimney."

"The Wall Donald Trump's plan to build a wall might actually work. The Chinese built a huge wall, and they have almost no Mexicans in their country."